thirty-three...

so we are 33 weeks today.

and tonight it becomes 2009.

i am feeling a little anxious about this year and all the changes it will bring.

for the rest of my life i will be thinking about this year...in a good way. maybe it will make up for 2008 when i lost my grandma - maybe my grandma will find her way into making this first year with my daughter a spectacular one. there are signs of her all over pj's nursery. her picture on the wall, books my grandma read me, butterflies above pj as she sleeps, and her first tutu in her closet. i know she is here...i know how much she would love to see pj...so i am certain she is finding her way into our new year.

as for greg and i, we are gearing up for the "change" ahead. her bedroom is a calming place for both of us, with clothes that smell like baby hung in her closet according to month...baskets filled with toys, blankets, diapers, etc., books on her shelf and socks in her drawers.

i am still wondering the same things though...what will she look like, will she want to be breastfed, how the hell will i get her out of me, will my water break during a school mass...you know, the normal things that keep me up at night even though i am completely exhausted.

for right now, the kicks are getting more painful as she has found my ribs and has discovered how to kick them over and over...and while i am moving more like a penguin, i am moving slightly faster than i was last week when all i could feel was a painful stretching across my belly.


signs of pregnancy bliss : not only can i not tie my own shoes or put the orange juice back correctly, but i also am starting to not fit in restaurant booths - there is too little space for my belly (which shoots straight out) to fit comfortably - and i get cramped up and leave in pain.

oh and i waddled into the post office and some lady coming out said to me "whoa, you look like you are about to burst" "when are you due" - and for shear pleasure i felt like saying "in 5 months" just to make her feel bad...but i told her the truth.

man i am too nice.

and she shall be graceful..or atleast look cute trying

so i was out and about today...

and i was simply glancing over at the kids clearance rack...

and it jumped out.

more like gracefully leapt out.

pj's first tutu.

it was 2.99 - what little girl is complete without a pink tutu?

and she shall wear it everywhere.

i wish they had one in my size, but i don't think strangers would think that was as cute as seeing a 4 month old in one....so i will live vicariously.

oj in the closet?

yes...i think i have reached my full pregnancy brain.

i wanted orange juice the other night. so i poured myself some.

and the next day when greg went to get a glass out of the cabinet...

he found the jug of orange juice next to the glasses.



i want my brain back.

32 weeks and a whoa...

so i am still laughing a little inside about the ultrasound technician saying "whoa" when her foot popped up on the screen. as in, she's a big one.

and i am getting crazy excited to meet pj.

my appointment on Monday went well. the midwives all think i am so funny. and i can't figure out why...i mean, they ask me everytime what my birth plan is...and i just say "PAINLESS".

this time we had the talk. the contraction talk. it is so weird to me to have to have that talk already. and that anyday, anytime, i could actually feel one. fake or not...i could actually feel one.

so she went through the procedure for what i should do. only i kept laughing, cause she said if i do feel one, drink lots of water and lay down with my feet up, or take a hot shower or bath. i am thinking if this happens during school - the shower may be tricky.

greg and i signed up for a birthing class. it says bring pillows and a blanket. what are we doing...acting it out? i am not sure i am up for that. plus, the thought of holding my legs open and up for any length of time just stresses me out.

an update on pregnancy bliss : got my first heartburn today. that was crazy painful. and it is getting harder and harder to get out of bed - and to move after being in the same place or position for two long. like my legs are separating from my body and being replaced with painful sticks of concrete. it's creating a very attractive walk - i must say.

merry christmas by the way, and yes the 'by the way' is on purpose. doesn't feel much like christmas. all the parking lots are accessible, lines aren't long, and i am not nearly as stressed out as i should be.

i even had time to make 36 deviled eggs and a pecan pie today. that was after shopping, and a mini-nap. explain that people? so i will new year you all later, for now, make the most of the eve of christ's birth. i finally feel mary's pain.

31 and happy...

hey, i guess today makes her as many weeks as i am in years. that is a crazy thought.

i am still basking in the glow of happiness. even this rotten cold that has suddenly taken over my body is no match for the good thing my baby and i have going.

i just measured my belly - the way they do during the appointment (from top to bottom over the mountain) and i am close to 41 cm. explain that people. it is supposed to match the weeks you are. ahem.

our little stinker definitely has a sleeping pattern down. she is pretty calm and quiet from 3am-8am then again from 11am-1pm then again from 3pm-5pm ... very odd. but i have noticed the lack of flashdance moves within - and they say that is normal.

i am feeling really stretched right now. but now that i know how big she is...it makes sense. poor girl, i hope she has enough room in there. i think she hears me typing and she likes it, cause she is kicking hard. could be that third glass of OJ that i just downed though. who knows?

anyway, we are both 31 today. and i just can't wait to meet my daughter.

whoa...pj is pushing maximum density

so my sweet little girl is going to be okay. the ultrasound today confirmed that both the cysts had dissolved. all four chambers of her little heart are perfect. her big feet are perfect. her long limbs are perfect. her little wisps of hair are perfect. her five fingers and five toes are perfect. her stomach is perfect. her lips are perfect. her spine is perfect. her round belly is well, round. and her flexibility...well, not only can i feel that constantly, but she proved it by keeping her toes in her mouth throughout most of the ultrasound.

she is 4.6 pounds. people...its week 31. holy moly. most of the baby books say she should be around 3.3 -3.5 pounds. she is 4.6. good god. she is my daughter.

greg and i are elated. what was amazing this time was watching her move and simultaneously feeling her move. seeing her face, watching her play hide and seek. i am just so happy right now.

here are some photos from her last shoot...she is such a ham for the cameras.

i don't do bathrooms now...

so this weekend greg and i got so much accomplished. new trimwork cut and painted, pj's mobile hung above her crib, a new color for our bathroom, a scrubbed and scoured freshness to the bathroom, and a new fixture that adds much needed light to that bathroom....

only, i think i did too much. cause i cramped and spotted last night...and when i called the midwife to check to make sure i was okay...she said "what did you do today" and when i rattled off the long list - she said "well, of course that would happen...take it easy"

so i am going to take that as...don't clean the bathroom. sorry greg. you have a new job until February. of course there is the healing time too...make that March.

thanks babe.

thirty, flirty, and thriving...

so...we made it to the ten week mark.

ten weeks.

she could be here sooner.

i was really freaking out for a bit to think about how my entire life is going to change in a matter of ten silly weeks.

until i was at Qdoba (the best burrito place EVER) and there was this hot dad standing in line behind me. and he started yelling my actual baby name out saying "come here ( " PJ " ), come here ( " PJ " ) " and i turned around and there was this little girl with blonde bouncing curls and blue eyes, smiling ear to ear, dressed head to toe in pink - waddling like a 16-18 month old kid would - coming towards the hot man standing next to me.

and i thought to myself - i can't wait for my life to change because no matter how hard being a mom is going to be, being ( "PJ" ) 's mom is going to be the best thing i have ever done in my entire life.

i jumped in my imagination to that moment when greg is up in line, calling out her name, and she is waddling with glee towards him. i just melted with happiness. call me hormonal...but i think that was the best burrito i've ever eaten.

go get a burrito and cry with happiness - its a good ending to a long day.

signed, sealed...delivered?

so i have been trying to figure out what her taste in music will be...i play all sorts of music and wait for her to get moving in there.

turns out she is an official stevie wonder fan. found out this morning.

i couldn't be more proud of her choices already. she is so smart.

"i feel like this is the beginning, though i've loved you for a million years...how could so much love be inside of you"

what a great moment i just had with my daughter.

now we just have to worry about her taste in men.

29 weeks...

or as my classroom blog puts it...75 days until pj arrives.

so most of my nights now consists of trying to sleep while pj throws mini-dance parties in there.

which means one or two things...1. that she will be a night owl like her daddy and/or 2. she will be a fantastic dancer like her mama.

one other thing i have noticed since entering my third trimester...i can barely put socks and shoes on without being completely out of breath. gone are the days of quickly resting my foot up onto my knee to gracefully put on my sock of choice whilst my shoe awaits below. now its a process that leaves me making grunting noises - and my socks...need to be looser - and my shoes need to be shoestringless otherwise poor greg has to do the tying.

also - yesterday on the playground for recess i had a mom tell me how she was so nervous when she was pregnant cause she kept losing weight in every area except her belly...how she was just all belly... and i felt like i was going to have one of those movie moments where i turn to the camera and pull my hair while i let out a blood-curdling scream.

so instead of screaming, i hiked up my rubberbanded pants, said "oh that must have been nice" and rang the bell two minutes early. i had a part of a cherry flavored candy cane when i made it back to my desk. and it was good.